These are all genuine quotes from people who have read my stuff…

” Self-opinionated prick.”

“I have just finished reading all of your blog posts and I was soooo entertained. Brilliant. Keep them coming.”

“I’m loving your blog!”

“Legendary and informative.”

” You, sir, are an unmitigated twat. Well done!”

“Awesome piece of writing.”

“Good reading as per usual.”


“Step it up a notch! It’s seriously lacking in entertainment value.”

” I [heart] your blog.”

“Stunning piece of critical writing.”

“I’ve read it and it’s really good… so far.”

“I probably shouldn’t read this in work.”

“That’s fucking beautiful.”

“I wish I was as eloquent as you.”

“YOU FUCKING BASTARD! That’s all I have to say.”

“I may not agree with what you say but I enjoy reading it.”


“You think in an odd way.”


“Thoroughly enjoyable read all round. Keep up the good work!”

“You are a cunt.”

  1. Rob says:

    Cheers for the Jam! That’s brought back some memories!
    You are of course right about the idiots. I used to spend a great deal of time ‘debating’ creationists, religious conservatives (dare I say religious people in general?) and conspiracy theory lunatics until I eventually realised that they are simply too stupid to understand even simple concepts. (like that of a double negative in the case of a few)
    Some good came of it though, as I realised that if it had taken me so long to work this out I was clearly not as clever as I had led myself to believe.
    Got to find some Blue Jam now and listen to some bonobo whacking.
    Thoroughly enjoyable read all round. Keep up the good work!

    • Simon says:

      Thanks for the feedback. It’s always appreciated!

      I have the Blue Jam CD if ever you’d like to borrow it? ‘The Suicide Journalist’ is my favourite track (would you still refer to it as a track if it’s not music?). ‘4ft Car’ is another great sketch but that’s also featured in the TV show.

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